While growing up, we have seen the lady slogging in another corner doing chores even when we are chilling, yet joining us back with a big smile always. “Mumma”…the most beautiful woman we have ever seen or felt. She may not know good fashion, she may be living a bad hair day 24*7, she may have just one style of clothes in her wardrobe with just different colors in the name of change; yet her mere smile makes any celebrity run for her money, for us. Because she is pure, she is imperfectly perfect, she is Mumma.

However, because we have seen women of our mothers’ generation slogging themselves for the sake of family, giving up careers, zero personal space, always being judged, always compromising, adjusting….that it has made us wonder if it worth giving up our individuality for so many years and possibly never coming back again to normal free self. Our generation was pampered, girls were given equal and best education like boys, were brought up like princesses; which all made us well aware of the importance of being independent, passion of climbing up the career graph came naturally and with nuclear family system in place, it leaves no scope to give up career totally after planning children in marriage.

Motherhood is not tough only today, it has always been tough and loving…. “Motherhood” has been difficult for all, because it drastically changes a female- biologically, psychologically and well as individually. However, today, it is difficult for women to lag behind in the race of life and having a baby puts a break – big or small and for some, it is forever. Thus, there is a shift of mindset about becoming a mother. Some ladies prefer to plan a baby atleast after 3-5 years of marriage, most get done at single child and some opt not to be a mother forever. The concept of DINK couples i.e. Double Income No Kids is catching up slowly.

So how do you decide if you want to be a mother? We should understand that each female is different, their journey has been different, their back story, the future plans, the relationship you share with your partner etc… So, even if you are pondering over this question or someone around you, the best advice you can give is not make your decision based on someone else insistence, a woman has to listen to her heart and gauge her situation…most important being availability of a support – it could be your relative, your partner, a house help, or your inner strong self; but do make sure you totally understand what it means becoming a mother and planning for a baby. Be sure, be cheerful of this decision because you have to bring and raise a life and yes it is hell of a responsibility but extremely serene….whatever you decide make sure it is done mutually and thoughtfully with your partner. Cheers!

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